claudia lamer#2

2011-04-25T23:37:00.003+08:00

I AM NOT INTERESTED IN WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY OK. enough is enough. haven't you hurt me enough? do I need this kind of treatment from you? I am not a freaking slut that goes LIKING EVERY DICK FROM EVERY CORNER! your words hurt me. a lot.

wtf forget it. i cant even blog about this

ok fuck bye.

2010-02-12T11:25:00.002+08:00

huh. im back, finally. lolz. all that o lvl and fairfield drama is finally over. (= sooooooo, what are the happy facts? one, im outta my shit hole. two, im going to a school where there are completely no fairsians. (woohoo!) three, im helping out HQ. (= four, im working ;) five, got into the course I want and six, welll, im just damn fucking happy.

honestly, mentor was right. ur in the shithole u whine and cry. outta the shithole u laugh and say : "omg, tts damn stupid." hahahahaha . right. congratulations. uh-huh. someone even suggested my life is like so damn 'aim-less' but i say tis guy is 'ball-less' .

anyhow, i went to raffles city to shop. but i only ended up wif a book. fantastic. i realised that i have a lot of things i wanna do, so gotta study hard right? absolutely.

wanna travel the world, buy a camera, get a blackberry storm, own thousands of bags, want plenty of jeans and credit cards, am i starting to be bimbotic?????? sad uh.

wish upon a star.

2009-09-11T18:07:00.001+08:00

today was ... hectic... my name is claudiaaaa... gahhh.. im so not feeling well today ok.. and my body aches all over and im tired..... ok... im gg to muggg... but im real tired.... jiayous to me.... (= im still happy...tiredly happy...

True by Ryan Cabrera

2009-09-10T21:40:00.002+08:00

True - Ryan Cabrera lyrics :

I won't talk
I won't breathe
I won't move till you finally see
that you belong with me

you might think
I don't look
but deep inside in the corner of my mind
I'm attatched to you

mmmm
I'm weak
it's true
cause I'm afraid to know the answer
do you want me too?
cause my heart keeps falling faster

[chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true
so I will not hide
i'ts time to try anything to be with you
all my life I've waited
this is true

you don't know
what you do
everytime you walk into the room
I'm afraid to move
I'm weak
it's true
I'm just scared to know the ending
do you see me too?
do you even know you meant me!

[Chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true
so I will not hide
its time to try anything to be with you
all my life I've waited
this is trueI know when I go
I'll be on my way to you
the way that's true

[chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line to the only thing thats true
so I will not hide
its time to try anything to be with you
all my life I've waited
this is true

it's a new day.

2009-09-10T13:28:00.003+08:00

helloo world!! actually, i've been rather down n out, ut im fine now! (: plus, o levels is only 1 month plus away.... my birthday is coming!!! :D:D:D:D today is thurs and schools reopening on monday. i've been contemplating whether or not to go to school. but i decided i wld have to as to seeing the results being released then. *groans.

im prettty frustrated coz im in quite a fix. school, love life. etc etc. anyway, i know it'll be over soon and good things are gonna come my way! :D

tmr is a friday. and fridays are usually my best days(till now.) so i decided i wld do smth good tmr. like study at gramps place.... like chilling tmr.... sigh, alot of things. i need LOVE!!! =( not juz guys love. my friends are'nt really helping. but then again, my mood mustn't depend on them. (: im v happy now, and i will always be!!!! (:(:(:

well let's see, i can look forward to bday, my end of o's, my partying!!! :DDDDDDDD chillax.

dunno y i keep wanting to drive recently... hmmz. anyway, im eyeing the new volkswagen golf. (: in red. hahaha!!! papa says "i can buy. no problemo!! are you aure u can fit it?" and mummy was laughing like mad. damn it!!! >.<>.<>

"you know ah... haha... papa and mummy said.... hahahaha.... you suit the golf v well. *snickers."

ME: "yeah. DUH. i know. great things for great pple. *winks"

did: " dey say its bcoz its got a bug butt, juz like you! HAHAHAHAHA"

ME : -_-

oh darn. hahaha!! but it does make sense and its kinda funny though. lolz

there. it actually looks even more beautiful when u see it than on picture. so oh well. its not actually my dream car, i wanted a lamborghini. but oh well, reality wise. this is de BEST. (:

as for a house. im not quite sure yet. its like anything near de west. not an ideal place im like, "wadever god gives me." lolz

ok tts it for today. i'll blog tmr.

tata!!

love, Leah.

2009-06-10T16:48:00.002+08:00

i juz realised all my posts are damn emotional la. damn shit. ok, i shall no l sleeponger be emo(:
anw, today had a math. was ok la. but den finishing tt time i was like super duper hungry... den had history. mr.tan wear until damn funny. i dunno y but i find him damn short. lolz. den aft tt lunched wif jacq n rach. went back talked to delia, had consultation wif mr.tan den i went hom and im now slacking:D later den i shall do one SEQ den one e math paper den aft tt i shall slack some more. :D

these are things i wanna DO aft 'o's.
1. sleep for 30 hours non stop.
2. canoe
3. drink like a fish.
4. go to the beach at night alone and watch the moon.
5. spend time wif friends.
6. go mama hse n meet chloe n maine to slack our asses off.
7. go klp.
8. clt course
9. coxswain course
10. boat driving lisence.
11. teakwondo
12. sim whole day
13. go out alone for the whole day
14. slack whole day
15. movie marathon
16. play comp
17. play PSP
18. play DS
19. play PS3.
20. wakeboard
21. mountain biking
22. holiday

now de things i WANT
1. carlo rino bag
2. ZARA bag
3. Lamborghini
4. Jaeger-LeCoultre Reverso watch
5. Versace sunnies.
6. slippers
7. nike stuff
8. volkswagen golf
9. Nautica jacket
10. macbook and iPod classic
11. new phone
12. Clt rank
13. lisence
14. black belt
15. one more dog.
16. him
17. new desktop
18. new PS3 white
19. new DS black
20. PSP
21. Adiddas shoes
22. man U jersey
23. new glasses
24. DKNY bag
25. new pencil case n wallet(mine sucks BIG TIME)
26. shift hse ;D
27. new matress :D
28. new laptop
29. books. ( i noe i dun look like a book worn but i really love to juz stick my nose to a book n read)
30. a new me.

ok. so i jus realised im like asking for de sky. actually i basically just want a DKNY bag, lamborghini, versace sunglasses and a jaeger-LeCoultre watch. which, i juz counted, needs 2.2mil. hahaha!! no worries. i shall get it if i do well for 'o's. hmm.
:D eyeing the new adiddas purple shoes. wondering if i shld get it. ;) hmmmmm.... :D:D:D

2009-05-26T16:43:00.000+08:00

im like posting once every month la. lame. anw, i jus learned one impt thing through out this like entire time. nvr ever feel too much for one person coz its just gonna hurt. and im not talking abt love life. im talking abt friends. damn shit. i soooo want to voice out everything la. i dun care whether i love this razy bitch but im jus gonna say it out liao. coz i seriously had enough.

firsty,
i dont noe wads ur fucking problem. every morning go to school i try to talk to u, u give me crude short ans, and wth, i dont noe wads wif your "come lets start ignoring her and 'claudia see, u wan come n sit wif me'?" i talk to you, ur ans damn short, and its not like u treat everybody else tt way, u totally are NORMAL wif them laugh and all, but with me? u jus like "mm" "yah" "hi"(only when i say hi to you) "bye" and "ok". i noe tis may sound childish, but its da,mn ridiculous tt i muz go around kissing ur ass jus to see tt fucking smile on ur face ok. bullshit, all abt when i ask u" is it u dun want to talk?" u say yes i leave u alone, and de next thing i noe, there u r talking n laughing happily away.

so there, tks for making me pissed, tks for making me look like a bloody fucking TOOT to go around kissing ur fat ass, and tks for making my like more miserable then it is now.

next,
some pple have tis really huge problem wif their ego
their heads get so fucking big tks to EGO and cant take shame to their big male pride. i had enough tolerating u gay fuck, and there really is a limit to my tolerance level, and i alr warned u its not a high tolerance level. dont wanna listen, lets see wad happens to u tmr. i totally have no ego and it takes alot for me to be embarrassed, so piss me off, ONE MORE TIME and thats it, u will definitely skip school for at least a month. n u noe i hate threatening.

lastly,
i had enough of pple opposing everything tt i THINK(and not say) and fucking shit everything i do u also wanna stuck ur GAY ASS nose into every body's shithole!!! i will crush ur fucking small bones and BURN it to ashes if u dont know how to jus shut ur bloody fucking mouth. totally no manners at all. say im vulgar, but seriously, where's ur 'good behaviour' and 'little miss perfectionist' gone to? so, piss me off as well and i will FUCKING RIP UR MOUTH OFF UR FACE!

MY LIFE IS NOT MISERABLE ENOUGH SO PLEASE JUST MAKE IT MORE MISERABLE!

damn shit ok.

list of problems one teenager can get,
1. Home problems(yes)
2. Relationship problems(yes)
3. love prblems(yes)
4. School problems(yes)
5. Friends problems(yes)
6. Self problems(yes)

so here is to my miserable life, i sooooooo thank everyone out there for making me this miserable. thank you very much and may god bless u fucking hard.

to this 3 pple, ur not de only ones i feel like ripping ur throats out, de fucking lucky other massive no. has got away coz they dont mean much. piss me off when i have tolerated enough, and i swear to whoever u may believe in, you will nvr be pissing me off again coz i would have RIPPED UR HEART OUT!.

tts all.

2009-04-13T17:47:00.002+08:00

this post is just to clear things up bcoz i hate blogging and i din intend to for the whole year.
firstly, its not whether my bad attitude has come up again or what. i jus NEED TO BE ALONE. i dont want ANY company i dont want pple NEAR me AT ALL. i jus want all of you to GO AWAY coz i DONT WANT YOUR FAKE SMILES. ok. and when i dont talk to u pple u think im showing u attitude and all ignore me. NO. jus dont keep pestering me and yes im still your friend its just tt i want time to be alone and all. why cant u pple jus learn from yu tong?when i dont talk it DOES NOT mean im pissed. if my face OR eyes look angry its jus prob coz im ANGRY WIF MYSELF. and holy shit, i nvr even ignore u guys. I JUST WANT TO BE ALONE.

n if u dun noe y its prob coz u IDIOTS dun even noe how u make me feel. I HATE PPLE SO LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!

i dun trust no shit person now and i dont care if u think im a BITCH or what I DONT CARE! i HATE all u pple n I DONT EVEN WANNA SEE UR MISERABLE FACES and i DONT WANT TO CARE.

thats all.

2009-02-25T19:45:00.002+08:00

finally... this week has been rather hectic. argh.

firstly,
it's really hard to let go and put whatever u have faced and regretted behind you. But pple tell u wads de point. let it go. its de past. but its always easier said den done.
how can u put someone u love so much in danger and have no qualms abt it? ever tot how tt felt? no. even if u did de qns is so wad? we are such selfish pple i think. u put the person in danger, pple tell u its not worth it. its practically shifting your responsibilities and consequences to somene u love. have u ever imagine wad kind of guilt that will course through u everytime something triggers it? ever tot about how u betrayed tt person? ever tot how u scared de person? why do i not feel embarrased at it, is coz its true. frankly speaking, i feel so muh guilt and shame abt this. tt i was so selfish. and wad adds to your utmost dismay and uncertainties? the party's nonchalance. he doesnt give a fuck care abt it. maybe he did. but wads de use? sometimes i feel like im not the person i am. and its coz im so ashamed of it. i always say im stronger den this. but how far can i go on? im always not good enough. im so selfish. i cant make decisions. and de guilt is wif me forever. if anything, i'll say it jus made things worse. i go around pretending im de most idiotic bitch coz im so damn strong mentally. where do i stand? no where. there's jus so much anger pent up inside me, along with the guilt and shame that can never be reversed. i keep thinking, do i deserve a second chance? but do i really? no. and no one has. n i dont blame them. coz im too stupid for anything. whatever happened to de tough luck claudia? i dont know. i keep going around acting like im damn happy n i have everyting. truth? i have nothing. i lost the one thing i wanted most and i can nvr gain it back ever again. coz i only had it once.

den again. how can u lose something u nvr really held? that just makes u in a even more drastic position. i dont even know where to begin a new course. i dont know how to pick myself up.

and at times like this, i type and remind myself of wad i really am. and i dont know sometimes. but den at the end of the day i have to replay the words that seethed into my brain ever since a long time ago. "its life. pretencious, fake, illusions. and nothing can be real" and now? i really dont know. and all i can do is hold the hurt in my heart and cry painfully in the inside. i promised no feelings, i broken it. and everytime i look into tt person, i se so much hope. wasted hope. coz its a replacement of something that cant ever be replaced. and u jus keep on pretending like as if u r de luckiest person alive, when u r downright unhappy. is there a word that can describe me right now? hell, yeah. alot.

heartache, sorrow, regret, pain, guilt, anger, frustration, and dissatisfied. with me, with life, with everything.

and more to that, despite all this negative feelings, im sorry. idk if u still read like u used to do. and im sorry. sorry i hurt you. sorry i only said things. sorry for making u confused. sorry for not understanding. im sorry. there are really no more words to offer up. im very sorry.

sorry i had you pay for my past, though u nvr really felt it. sorry i am wad i am. sorry for everything. i dont expect anything from you. really. not even forgiveness. its just to tell you, i'll move on. put on my mask. pretend. and im sorry im like this. so sorry.

2009-02-19T20:40:00.001+08:00

MELISSA,
HAPPY 1ST ANNIVERSARY OF OUR SISTERHOOD! (:
ILOVEYOU.

19th feb' 09.

2009-02-09T19:28:00.002+08:00

i want to make this brief. and i know you read my blog.
kay, im angry with lots of pple now.
and im jus gonna type and type and u jolly well shut up and read.

1. i dont give a fuck care whether you like it or not, but if its my business then you should jolly well piss off.
2. stop irritating me and pushing you bloody damned luck coz i cant take it any more you son of a bitch! and one day, i'll seriously explode and all you do is "wad did i do everytime my fault. " why dont you shut the hell up, start acting like a MAN and a responsible one too and start looking that its not always my fault.
3. stop acting and pretending coz it seriously pisses me off like u r some book licker and u have no god damned backbone.
4. you have no fucking reason to come about yelling at me that i dont tell u things. for the millionth time, i told u i no need to report to you about every single move i make. shall i call you when i go take a piss????

so stop acting like a mother fucker and son of a bitch and start taking your bloody responsibility as a MAN and stop being so controlling. coz if u seriously dont piss and back off, you wont like it when i start correcting the bloody problem.

and if you are not happy wif me typing this and insist i too, muz tell u wad i blog, you better start preparing your first aid kit, however i recommend that u prepare a room in de hospital, although im not sure whether u will eventually make it out of the surgery room.

2009-02-07T22:11:00.001+08:00

vietnamvietnamVIETNAM!!! :D:D:D im so happy im going there la. i always wanted to go :D and de next place i want to go is RUSSIA!! :D i love travelling (:
first up, im damn pissed wif pple who act like complete idiotic spoilt BRATS. like wth. im not being nerdy or wad, but seriously, ur so bloody rotten spoilt i think no rotten apple can compare to you.tmr, i cant go church, and im pissed.im like confused in love lar! wallao. and there's lots of stuff i want to tell lao shi, but like no point la. argh. decisions decisions.
on a lighter note, im going out wif germaine on friday!!!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D HAPPY!! (= and we're gonna ask joanna out but she most probably has rowing. and her b'day is coming up and i have not plan her b'day yet.
so de plan is we go bowling eat and study. maybe accompany her buy clothes. i think? haha! germaine is so damn cute :DGWEN SMACKED MY BOTTOM AND I WANT REVENGEEEEE!!!! LOL. just u wait woman, hahaha :D
my dog CHEWED my wallpaper!! damnit. gahhhhhh damn tired. i look like a zombie and i studied at macs today. haha! :D
so much for avoiding pple lar. i end up still have to see him. wallao. -_-

2009-02-05T16:06:00.002+08:00

2 major things now. one is i wanna join rowing and am getting to it. ok, that aside, IM GOING VIETNAM!!! WOOHOO~~ im like super happy ok!! lol. im gonna get financial aid though lol. now recession. hahahaa :D okok. soo now im juz worried for my O's later den do revision... hee:D i miss gwen!! :'( so sad. haha. im so optimistic today lar!!! :D:D maybe coz tmr is the last day of the week thats why im so happy. :D:D:D:D yeah and im gonna need gods guidance for the next whole year plus the rest of this year. whoa its feb liao. lol.
okok!! so i plan to get the rowing thing done in maximum 2 weeks time. hmm...
VIETNAM is gonna be on 11 march to 17 march!! LOL. jo's b'day is in btw. darn man. i wanted to celebrate it. and she's like going to CHINA! like FRIGGIN CHINA! lol. and like nich fel mel rach all going CHINA!! and me jacq sarah felicia sarah and eunice going to VIETNAM. lol.

sooo left the following events for the friggin stressful year.
11-17/03 - VIETNAM
12/03 - JOJO's b'day.
12/04- GERMAINEE BLUR b'day. lol
MAY-JUNE- DSA APPLICATIONS. damnit.
JUNE- 1st chinese O levels exam
NOVEMBER- O LEVELS EXAM and 2nd CHINESE O LEVEL EXAM.
DECEMBER- PLAY PLAY PLAY AND PLAY HARD HARD!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:DDDD!!!

2009-02-04T16:04:00.002+08:00

gahhh dont know when was de last time i blogged. have not even looked at it yet.

ok... i seriously want to know why when i say i like chinese pple give me those awkward stares like as if im damn sacarstic?!! i mean like i really like chinese ok. and juz coz i dun do well in it doesnt mean i will hate it right. lol.

argh!! today was like nerve wreking la!! firstly ms. lee not here we have to chiong practical. den so hot i nearly died. aft that was a math. which was giving me a headache coz its new stuff plus de weather wasnt very kind... and de worse thing!! tt stupid product rule thing is so absurd!! we just learnt matrix like less than 2 hrs ago and give test its damn wat la. and somemore i cant elaborate coz lao shi say wad they read our blogs or smth like that. and thats why i dont have tagboard :D

eng was super wierd. i did like a structure to ans a essay qns : changes. i dunno why i was so detailed like teacher giving students s 'sure-win' format to ans de qns!! and we din present coz no time. soo friday we are going to get our reports back AND have to present.

the last and most panicky thing is that de internationalisation trip results were out and my name was not on any of the countries!! i mean put me to Laos or smth its fine but NONE?? i was so scared know. i din even get pissed or wad. plus i submited both forms early!! and i tot if ur last country u visited was damn ex maybe they wont let u. mine was NEPAL but jacqs was like TURKEY?!?!?! so i shld get in wad. somemore its my first choice. i blabbered everything to ms. liang and she was damn nice abt it. she was like okok dont worry ah i'll go check for u. (: and dont know why but her words were very assuring. :D and so i let it go and know im at home blogging away with lots of lit to do plus revision plus i still need room to get SIAN coz PE tmr. argh.

sooo im really anxious for tmr now. gahhh...

im sick too for like one whole bloody damned week!!! y cant i get MC as well??? argh. i hate my life.

2009-01-25T16:46:00.002+08:00

lol. very long nvr take pic alr. 'S ok coz i dont wan any memories aniwae. LOL. ask de vamp to help wif blogskin soo now awaiting something nice. ;D and thanks many many nich! lol
today we lo heng or smth. we say lots of funni stuffs. something in contrast to de misery i've been suffering from and yes! the long awaited CNY i've been hoping for. tis yr CNY hongbao confirm no money. den my dad and i were like discussing what we were gonna anticipate for the CNY hong bao. heehee:D de convo btw lamer 1 and lamer 2. (:

dad: i think maybe counterfeit note
me: no, maybe $2.
dad: nola, got so bad meh
me: got
dad: waa like that u sure yell 'wah piang eh!'
me: yarhhh :D:D:D u know me so well
dad: of coz maybe u open its de cold coins wif chocolate inside
me: maybe its u open then got one note there say have a prosperous chinese new year.

and den u should have seen my dads face aft tt. LOL

and cooliox! got OneRepublics disc. but like still dont have some songs i wanted from online. grr.

and great! tmr gambling starts. i din even touch a math yet. shit! but like SHIT! a math on wed! goddamnit mannn.. i tell u. life sucks.

and i did smth to the links thing. hope it looks better. argh. im hungry.

when will be de day? the day i run away?

2009-01-23T13:16:00.000+08:00

and i tot aft today which marks the end of de week and my long weekend, i would be super thrilled and thought "wow, its finally over." but now im jus thinking how fast the weeks are flying by. i have a lot of conclusions and stuff that i tot tis wk. but of coz, keeping a blog is useless. And fairfield is notorious for peeking into students blogs and catching them for various reasons. then they have some pretty lame remarks " I have sources" to make u feel like dey r so bloody witty. and being me, im certainly not believing tt kind of crap.
like i said, u could be de best teachers in the whole entire fucking world. but de one teacher that cares, outshines them all. im really wondering how i changed so much. im kinda getting more and more antisocial. and not only that. usually when teachers make fun of me like jus joking i get real irritated and start swearing when they turn their backs.then i'll get pissed. and when i get pissed i'll use alot of vulgarities and swear words. but like tis yr i keep yelling them only in my head. and like im so wierd. idk. i refuse to bother abt pple.like i can be alone and not care whether its cool or not. maybe i got lots of other things to worry about. but like my bro also noticed i dont care abt anything now.like if you guys embarass me or piss me. and i have no respnse. its no longer surprising. but if coz de vulgarities and swear words... well, im working on it.
anw, i seriously am confused in life. i've got this so many questions and no one to answer.

2009-01-17T18:19:00.001+08:00

im finally blogging again aft a wk. i dont really give a damn. jus edited the blog. and im lazy to change song. i just did it and i think it shall stay there until nxt yr. wallao. i dont even have time for myself. shit man. i have no life. and someone is messing with de wrong person.

one day, im going to snap and disconnect his limbs and head from his body. im sick and tired of all your nonsense and rubbish. im not even trying to put up wif it you son of a bitch.

either you are blind or you are gonna be cuz im going to make you one.
and if u dont, hell, fuck you, i'll burn you alive.
friggin shit, i keep having this fucking headache that doesnt go away. hell la, i want rip someone's throat out. and my limbs hurt from training.

wahh seyy.. dips damn pain.
alot of pple say i look like an assasinator. or wadever. someone who kills pple for $$$. i think. not a bad job really. i dont mind :D

2009-01-09T23:42:00.000+08:00

I'll do my crying in the rain, it'll wash my tears away. Far away till I wont know where it is. The most beautiful song sometimes bleeds.One day, we'll both forget everything we made from the start. Love crumbles. We will both forget the littlest things said and the slightest touch.

its de 9th. i dunno why but i jus feel tt tis no. is a very significant date lar. also dunno why. anw, de above sentence was jus something i thought of. last nite i was bzie tellin gyu tong my view of life n love. soo.. she understood and we both realized we had the same thinking and we were;nt so different aft all. i really hated the days of pain and crying. so anw, i promised to change my blog songs lest you get sick of it. anw, i plan on locking my blog soon. yeah, though i think not many pple read it. guess wad, my thinking is totally contradicting itself.idk wad to do. jus curl up or cry. but i told myself not to cry cuz its only for weaklings and im not. soo... i believe that i am strong enough to endure all this. its all part and parcel of life.

2009-01-03T11:33:00.000+08:00

well,
school suddenly changed alot. I'm not really sure if it's good or bad.
so im jus gonna follow ke lao shi instructions. i'm not going to care.

jus FOCUS on studies. den im outta here.im gonna get my butt outta fairfield. my business outta fairfield. its still hard to believe that im having my last yr here at fairfield. somehow i jus cant swallow it lor. like its still not registered yet. sigh. 10yrs in school. n finally, im going off. (: i think i left a few more months b4 i dig my grave. sheesh.

get over it, claudia.

whoa. im 16 n im finally getting out of faitfield in less then a yr. and i dont give a shit.

2009-01-01T17:34:00.000+08:00

so last nite i watched tv at de comfort of my own home wif nala. n my dad. n de body of my mom (her soul was somewhere in dreamland dreaming abt her D&G bag).
ok! so i counted down wif my dad andddddd..... *drumroll*
its 2009!! FINALLY!

for those who had a bad 2008, dont fret. it doesnt matter whether it wasw supposed to be a significant yr or wad, FORGET all bout wad happened. cuz its OVER and there's nothing u can do to change it. but there's a word of encouragement,its a NEW YR! n its gonna be great if u can make a brand new start. it doesnt matter wad happened last yr, so make 2009 a gd one. and best wishes to all!! (:

lalalala!!~~ gd news gd NEWS!!! tmr there's no maths!!! (: so i dont need hand up those killer homework! (: and on monday, there's no e math!!! (: GREAT!! :D

sooo.. im happy tt god made it a great 2008. if there's anything tt i learnt in 2008;

1. pple are not what they seem.
2. pple change ALL de time Any TIME.
3. only YOU can make decisions for urself.
4. there's no such thing as fate, no such thing as destiny. ONLY
-hope,
-faith,
-determination,
-perseverance,
-courage,
-hardwork,and of coz, god's decision n guidance. (:
5. i've become more independant. & mature.
6. money is not as "redundant" as everyone claims.
7. i can always count on god.
8. Don't put your happiness in things that can fail. including relationships.

soo.. here are some of my new yr resolutions;
1. dont be so vulgar.
2. stand up for myself
3. maintain my 'grown-up' understanding tt i learnt late last yr.
4. stop being so lazy.

well, to all u pple out there. you see, i dont give a shit abt anything. soo, late last yr n tis yr. im going to really not give a shit at all. cuz its not u pple i have to answer to at the end of de day. its god n myself.soo, BUZZ off. thanks you very much. and have a very happy new yr! (:

daddy says ; my brains on holiday (:

2008-12-25T15:35:00.003+08:00

its been nearly a wk since i last blogged.. managed to kick outta tt habit b4 school n new yr starts. well, de reason y im bloggin now is tuh wish every1 a v MERRY XMAS n HAPPY NEW YEAR! may god bless u abundantly n may good health wealth and prosperity be upon every1 tis day n forever.. ALL GOD'S PPLE PRAISE DE LORD FOR HE IS GOOD! (PERFECT!!! ) anw, off for dinner (: byebye. rmb JESUS was born on tis day to DIE for your sins! rmb to pray today (and everyday!)

P.S sorrie pple, i've been bzie =P. will get back to you soon. btw, my brains still on holiday.. argh. -_-

If I could hear your voice, I know I, will be okay. I know that I've been wrong, but im begging you to stay. Won't you stay???

2008-12-19T16:06:00.003+08:00

its been almost a week since I last went clubbing and im itching to go there again.. cuz its de place where i belong.. where imperfectionism takes over.. hell, sin and everything else that i can swallow of what the world really is. ; imperfect, sinful, toxic, BAD. and all de horrid stuff. so i think i'll head over to bala clava.. get 2 martini's and a berbun coke. hmms. then jus let de music take over me.. arghh.. i went house hunting today btw ^^ aha. and im happy cuz i completed one chapter of my a math in jus 1 day (= gratttts to me sia! btw, LEEN, welcome back! aku missed you! (=

today i wanna share a song wif u guys. there's not much meaning but the background is really great. i heard it at blava clava last sat. and i dunno why it jus made me very emotional.. so well, its MY blog.. so i need to share feelings rite. once again. KEEP UR CRAP COMMENTS TO URSELF. (unless its good ones.)
I can't sleep Tonight - Phats and small
go to imeem and type under music I can't sleep tonight. de second song^^ sry but blogger jus happens to be so f-ing suckinsh. WXYZ! sorry.

leahleahleah..

2008-12-18T22:27:00.003+08:00

GAHHHHH.. im going madddd.. in 4 days i will lock my blog!! (: so feel free to browse n criticise (n be ignored) and den it'll be locked till i feel like it! (=
tmr swim trg! argh! im gonna feel like a jellyfish againnnnnn... nooooo... !! =(( i still need to improve timing!!! GRR! =X nvmmmmmm.. gogogoGoGOOO CLAUDIAAA!!! =P

i tink my second name will be Leah.. like since you guys wanna noe de details. here.

1! its nice n matches my first name
2! it sounds cool
3! it sounds fierce n rugged
4! its a werewolf's name
5! it starts wif L.

soo.. THATS it! n dont come bug me anymore pple! =P.. noe wad.. im missing someone i really should'nt.. but nvm.. i'll jus ignore that feeling then! (=sooo today i accomplished quite alot of homework n of coz i am happy! and soo.. i will have gd dreams tonight.. ^^

claudia leah so needs to buck up for her gold star n 'O' levels. ohOhOH!! btw!!;;;
CONGRATULATIONS MY HEARTFELT GRATTTSSSSSS like gratttss CHARMAINE my COUSIN for scoring so well in 'N' levels!!!!i feel so happy for youuuu!! (= JIAYOU! (=

iloveyoucousin!! (=

recommended song for a sad heart to go to sleep.. ;
Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis.

Closed off from love I didn’t need the pain
Once or twice was enough
And it was all in vain
Time starts to pass
Before you know it you’re frozen

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melted to the ground
Found something true
And everyone’s looking round
Thinking I’m going crazy

But I don’t care what they say
I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

But nothing’s greater
Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me
Thinks that I’m going crazy, baby, baby

But I don’t care what they say
I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep (keep) bleeding love (love)
You cut me open

And it’s draining all of me
Oh they find it hard to believe
I’ll be wearing these scars
For everyone to see

I don’t care what they say I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing (ooh)
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding (ah ah)
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love (ooh ooh)
Keep bleeding (oh ooh ooh)
Keep, keep bleeding love (love)
(Oh) you cut me open and I
Keep bleeding (ah ah)
Keep, keep bleeding love (yeah ah yeah)
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love (oh, I keep bleeding love)
Keep bleeding (I keep)
Keep, keep bleeding love (oh)
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love

claudia leah see?

2008-12-17T22:28:00.002+08:00

enough,
i had enough of thinking of you
i had enough of protecting you
i had enough of being nice to you
i had enough of pretending nothing ever happened
i had enough of trying to run away from who i am
i had enough of trying to be someone im not.

dunno why i still think of you at night, and then the next morning i decide to forget you all over again. and the cycle just keeps repeating!
and now I know I don't deserve anything. not ur thanks not ur questions not even ur advice. do i always have to keep blasting songs into my ear for 2 mins everynite when i go to bed!?! i dont know how long i can take this. i dont know how long i can pretend! this is some really crap shit okay..

currently listening (blasting at 100% vol.)
Disturbia - Rihanna

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum (Whats wrong with me?)
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum (Why do I feel like this?)
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum (I'm goin' crazy now)
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
No more gas, in the rig(Can't even get started)
Nothing heard, nothing said (Can't even speak about it)
All my life on my head (Don't wanna think about it)Feels like I'm going insane, yeah

It's a thief in the night to come and grab you
It can creep up inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind it can control you
It's too close for comfort

Put on your brake lights
You're in the city of wonder
Ain't gon' play nice
Watch out you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise

Your minds in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scarin' you tonight
Your minds in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia, disturbia

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

Faded pictures on the wall(It's like they're talkin to me)
Disconnectin' all the calls(The phone don't even ring)
I gotta get out, oh
Figure this shit out
It's too close for comfort ohh

It's a thief in the night to come and grab you
It can creep on inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind it can control you
I feel like a monster oohh

Put on your brake lights
You're in the city of wonder
Ain't gon' play nice
Watch out you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise

Your minds in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scarin' you tonight

Your minds in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia, disturbia
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum(Disturbia)
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

Release me from this curse I'm in
Tryin' to maintain but I'm struggling
If you can go
Think I'm gonna ahhhh

Put on your brake lights
You're in the city of wonder
Ain't gon' play nice
Watch out you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise

Your minds in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scarin' you tonight
Your minds in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia, disturbia
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum(Disturbia)
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

there's someone im waiting for. day or month or year.

2008-12-16T19:14:00.003+08:00

I dont want any shit from you okay? its like hell irritating. and btw, i hate you.
; ignore the werewolves earlier statement. Dog's got moronic sides to then you know... i seriously dont know what is pple's problem lar. today I order chicken rice for me my bro n mom. the lady , (aft i waited for like hell long, I TOT U WANT TO DA PAO!?! fuck you bitch. like which part of the " 3 chicken rice thigh one thigh ,fried faster pls." do you not understand YOU friggin bitch.. and when she came, my mom said : WOW, her face is so irritating. ME : yeap. without a doubt.
n my bro laffed. well, as you know, werewolves (dogs) eat alot. so as usual i ate one chicken rice and one mee pok. TAA-DAA. jus FASCINATING. swam 20 laps. wallao. den want to rain so werewolf zhao..the stupid lady better call me otherwise de werewolf will personally come down and rip her miserable head off. i started doing my work today. hooray! NOT. i only did 2 quews. (= pro rite ^^
btw, I WANT TO FORGET YOU YOU YOU YOU. and i dont wanna think of you. nite n day, if i ever think of you, its cuz im having nightmares.. AND i want a god-bro like jacob black(= he's hot. but i only want him as a bro man!! (=hmms. he's hot but not as hot as KEANU REEVES =DD

is he hot or wad!?! (=

hahhahha.. so hot. he's 44 btw. LOL.
its like a thief in the night to come and grab you. YOU steal my heart you bastard. i so need to installo a burglar alarm in my heart.
back to work dog. argh!! I. am. in. a. need. of. going. bala clava. for. a barrel. of. drinks. LIKE LOTS OF ALCOHOL. b4 my heart rips again.

its a game and we're all victims of love.

went out wif nich fel and ger yst. hmms. okay and the vampires, THE FRIEKING IRRITATING vampires. also dont know wads wrong wif them. was raining and they still at school dunno do wad.or maybe they need a better weather forecaster. n de HUMAN. the pathetic human finished her VB trg so late!! GRR. i swear the werewolf almost ripped their miserbale heads off.
as dogs need to hibernate, so does the werewolf alpha. (=

i shall stay up till 2am to study. byebye pple(= keanu reeves is so frieking hot. he aint anyone's he's MINE =DDDD

2008-12-14T21:09:00.000+08:00

claudia wants Keanu Reeves baby! (=

currently listening - MONSOON.

2008-12-13T16:17:00.002+08:00

raining today! argh. n i walked alot today! hah! -_-. i dunno y im losing appetite! GRR. n i realise i keep eating alot of bread talk bread (: muhaha!!! so walked to CENTREPOINT todayyy.. n it rained!!! we din even expect it to rain can. so we wanted to run back. so aft abt 10 mins of waiting under shelter n being a singaporean, scared kena SUMMON!! sooo.. we decided to run. but god is so good. (: i kinda prayed. GOD, im so scared i'll fall if i run all de way back to the car. n guess wad. de moment i stepped out of de shelter. the rain started to stop (: its so awesome cuz the rain was so heavy!! (: happy(: n den i ate my bread(((:

sheesh.. my bro like v boot licker sia. today amy cooked chicken rice. firstly, the chicken is so god damn disgusting. the gravy tastes like wad.? .. duck? yucks. den the chicken is so rough n hard. sick -_-. so i only ate abit of chicken cuz my throat n tummy not satisfied. i ate half de rice cuuz it jus tastes horrible. so i drink vitamin C which tasted alot better(:

hahah~~ so stupid. im playing pokemon. which is lame but i got nothing better to do. hmms. and and and ... yst BBQ was nice(" i kept thinking of 2 diff pple =((( hmms.. need catch up wif WENXI. anw, i need to level up my darling wartortle so he'll be a blastoise(((((: hehe!!

school is reopening n claudia has not done her work. yeah. who cares? (:

confusion not = to anxiety`

2008-12-12T12:18:00.002+08:00

hmms.. this is really called CONFUSION okay. argh!! last nitei was doin my a math man! mrs.tan was as usal pinching me for getting wrong answers. she says i shoot my mouth off wifout carefully analyzing the situation/question. (so true) . nabeiii... i dun even noe if i shld be happy or upset abt this lahhh... damnit! im going to watch twilight wif nich fel n a couple of other frens... gahhhh.. tonite BBQ ((((((: hahahaha!! i miss joanna!!! ='( n i get to see her.. later! haha!! ^^ ta-daaa!! i heard someone today -_- ..

De recommended song for today!! ;
Here without you - Three doors down.

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
They disappear now when I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight
It’s only you and me

The miles just keep rolling
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go
I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
You're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl
It’s only you and me

Everything I know
And anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it’s all said and done
It gets hard but it won’t take away my love
I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl
It’s only you and me

# of days. wifout u. gosh. wad a BIG issue. -_-

2008-12-11T15:30:00.000+08:00

argh! today. the odds are just againt him.. ='( aniwae. went swimming today .. 20 laps!! argh! n my timing.. sheesh. 3 mins 10 secs.. for 100m.. grattss. im damn far frm my target. its 3 mins for 2 laps. so im 10 se cs behind.. n if i dont get 10 secs ahead.. i cant sit for my gold star!! =(( sobsob.. when we went to de lift today something super uber funny happened... cuz de lift like nvr close door so den mommy said. wallao! stupid lift!! i press close alr noe.. den i laffed.. n den she said. next time no need press anything liao. technology so advanceddd... den amy said. yar. hand foot mouth disease.. den we all laff. den she continue (my mom) jus say close n 13th floor. den cuz tt time we were at west mall. den de lift overload.. so de lift got like voice pre programmed. den it went like. overload. someone pls get off. which was so funny. n den i told my mom next time if lift can understand voices den it can talk to. den cuz i noe pple like to FART in lifts. n pple burp. den we were like saying. de lift will go. the one in red/blue/white tee shirt. u jus farted. imagine de persons face sia!!!! HAHAHA. den we kept teasing each other. you lar you lar. fart in lift.. HAHA. so all in all a v v v v v happie day! (:
btw, i still love you. yes, you.

2008-12-10T11:28:00.003+08:00

argh! im wasting my life away. ok. first things first. hmm.. to de person im referring to, u usually read my blog. i dunno if u still do now, but i kinda dun wanna add u.. dont mistake me.. i din accept de friend invitation in de first place. n yeah, i dun wanna be ur friend. sorry.

currently listening to DOY by kangen band.. de lyrics is malay so i dont really understand. maybe i'll get sazleen to interpret or smth. aniwae. i have not done much work. n now im drowning myself in work so i wont be able to think of him (: n yeah, it kinda works. its a plus cuz i get to finish off lots of work n yet at de same time not think of him! (: its great really.

i din drink alcohol!! jus like i promised myself!! if i can keep tis up for 2 more weeks, i have kept my promise. no alcohol for 6 weeks (: hmm.. recently i have been listening to tis song, over you by daughtry. its kinda great. i like de background. n de lyrics sort of mean smth to me. aniwae.
yeah. i kinda recommend music? lols. my playlist kinda like my faavourite selection? hahaha! okok. i will change it monthly.. so yst was 9th december.. so i'll change de playlist again on 9th of jan den (:

aniwae. here's de lyrics for ur convenience. its de first song on de playlist. (: P.S i din say de song applies to me. i jus said it has meaning for me...

Over you - Chris Daughtry.
Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure. I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
* I should've started running A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you, I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you. Well I got over you. I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through, I got over you.

2008-12-09T10:42:00.002+08:00

can i jus voice out an opinion. wait. its my blog rite? kay. im kidding. de werewolf is gg crazy...
NUMBER ONE ; im a frieking bitch n tt's abt it. fer the many out there tt hate me, congratulations. i jus exiled myself to a world tt hates, well, namely, ME.

i hate ME i hate ME i hate ME. u wanna noe why???? bcoz even if i wanna voice tis stupid feeling in me, i cant. n fuck man! y am i such a person. y cant i juz change? n i noe de god damned ans. its cuz i haf tis stupid STUPID part of me tt doesnt wanna let go. n not only tt. im FAT n UGLY n SUPER f-ing ATTITUDE of mine tt not even i can stand.

NUMBER 2 ; IM A LOUSY DECISION MAKER ( n im refering to all things not jus one part )

bcoz when i wanna rmb things so well at tt time, its in my FRIGGIN head. n i cant take it out at all. n CONGRATULATIONS once more claudia. tis is all part of growing up. n claudia, u keep thinking ur bloody smart. u keep thinking ur bloody intelligent. u keep thinking u r so damn good. im gonna slap myself awake now. IM NO GOOD. n tis growing up bullshit tt i haf to go through, im not handling it well at all.

NUMBER THREE ; I HAVE NOT DONE ANY SINGLE PIECE OF SHIT HOMEWORK.

so pls clap. i din even do ONE question frm any homework at all.

now, here comes de pouring out part, whereby ms.claudia see AKA bitch is gg to pour out everything. n as said b4. when de sentences start becoming too "CHEEM" n de vocab oso come out like damn wierd n hard to understand. only ms. joanna chan lai cheng knows how i feel. bcoz claudia feels like crying now n she promised herself she should never cry. so de vocab word for this nagging irritating feeling?? to sum up, im helpless. im stupid..

next, claudia covered up everything. she tried to move on she tried to forget everything. but bcoz of her stupidity, she fcking has to make a decision now. n of coz she cant. n now, im waiting for joanna to come back. i miss joanna. i miss joanna. i miss joanna.

thanks so much. for listening. hint ; it isnt all. only nicholas will noe wad im saying. if u cant figure this part out, ur stupid. not nich. everyone. (i told u im a bitch.)

I TRY to forget u, u jus haf to re-appear out of thin air. when i tot i moved on. ur name jus keeps appearing in my head. r u safe? do u think abt me? y do i even bother? i DONT WANNA care. i had enuff. den when i like someone else, u reappear. n then i realise. how am i gg to face him? tell him tt i dun really like him n i still care abt u? its been a year zheng xian. A YEAR. n i cleaned up everything. lying again n again. i hate myself. damnit.

u urself also lied. n now, im gg to avoid u. i tried n guess wad i cant. so now, y dun u jus hate me? bcoz i still love you. i still do. n everything else is fake exceept this. sigh, i missed u. n i think its best if i jus treat u as a friend.

2008-12-02T11:15:00.002+08:00

drifted to nich's blog n somehoow those who read de quiz muz do it i think? normally i would jus ignore tt kind of bullshit crap but since de werewolf has nothing to do, n de werewolf beta is still sleeping, i decided to kill time (n myself) by doin a crap quiz for sum idiots to know me better.

DE IdIOTIC QUESTIONS.
1. Do you have secrets?
;its a secret.

2. Would you fall in love with someone younger than you?
;no frieking way.

3. Do you enjoy going to school?
;depends on which part of school life ur talkin 'bout.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
;but a ferrari, but a mansion, but a couple more goldens, a hell expensive
-phone
-wallet
-bags
-pencil case. namely, v v v v branded stuff for me myself n i (yes, im an EXTREMELY hell selfish person.)

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
; no, once someone is my best friend or even friend, somehow i wont be able to even think about romantic stuff wif him/her( im no lesbian hor).

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
;err. depends on wad situation.

7. Who do you idolise worship?
;the LORD.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
;leave him be. anw, i dun trust anyone.

9. Is there anything that has made you extremely happy?
;hell, DUH.

10. Do you have any regrets?
;my whole life, PLENTY.

11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
;10 yrs older.

12. Who are currently the most important people to you?
;well, apart frm de usual god family n frens n AHEM! (: its me myself n i(:

13. What kind of the person do you think the person tagged you is?
;err. i dunno. ok luh. abit well, feminine but v nice(:

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
;rich n single, (like i said, im a damn bloody selfish person.). y would i wanna suffer being married n worse, poor.

15. What is your favourite colour?
;purple! (:

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
;i'll tell u when i finally like a straight guy.

17. What would you do if someone whom you hate ask for your forgiveness?
;if im mean i'll probably hate tt person more. if im happy i'll probably be frens wif tt person.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
;no

19. Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?
;single. cuz i dun trust de XY.

20. 6 people I have tagged:

1! SAZLEEN! (: (OF COZ!!)
2! germainee
3! joanna?
4! inez
5! XXXX
6! readers! pls ans truthfully (:

2008-12-01T09:42:00.000+08:00

eeks. joannas gg to be away for a week n i so damn miss her alr ok! =( sad* anw, i jus rmb something maine said which was so damn cute n funny.

im doing stupid things cuz ur not entertaining TKL!! LOLX. inside joke luh hurrs.. (= hmm.. den i'll do crazy things cuz someone is not entertaining de werewolf.. (=

blahs. guess wad happen. nala pee-ed on my BED!! YES!! SHE PEE-ED ON MY PRECIOUS BED. n i jus hated it ok!! i was so thorough cleaning it off cuz its my prize possesion. n she angered de werewolf ALPHA! hahahahaha!!

bleahs. now i demote her from beta to omega! lol. no such thing im talking crap but pls dont ignore the werewolf(: we're animals too n u shld treat animals kindly(: n i wanna change my blog skin ok!! GRRs.

de werewolf got woken up to rip humans head ff for breakfeast today n now de werewol wants to go to de river to swim(clean herself) n den de werewolf wants to hibernate. ZZZZZZzzzzz. >.<

2008-11-29T19:34:00.002+08:00

haha.. jus F.Y.I for all pple. i DONT really like de twilight saga. cuz its kinda like ordinary. n in de end no one popuplar in de series dies so it really isnt thrilling. but, i must say stephenie has v creative ideas on de characters. however her storyline isnt very fasinating. next, i only like one part of the twilight series n tt is de werewolves part. all 'bout jacob ripping pple apart. n de only vampire i like is jasper. i jus like his character. so, there. crap, dun bother me 'bout tis thing.

anw, talked to sazleen n shes super shocked. muhaha. (= plus my phones acting wierd. hell, i hate it when tis happens. n i still owe lao shi a call. n i havent done ONE SINGLE PIECE OF SHIT HOMEWORK yet. n i dun intend to start but somehow i jus cant seem to get round tis thing called 'laziness'. damn it.

i so v v v v v miss someone v v v v v v v miserably. n i wanna stalk him. im gonna think of wad to do. like meet him at his void deck or smth den jus say hi wad a coincidence which sounds corny or shld i jus say i stalked u here cuz i so damn like u. which sounds so frieking disgusting cuz it so bloody true. n im tempted to say de bloody truth thing. n hence, im now in a dilema.. like since i bloody woke up. crap,! like WTF.

im tired im tired im tired im tired im tired... someone pls entertain de werewolf.

2008-11-28T20:42:00.002+08:00

A. People who have been tagged must write their answers in their blog.
B. Tag 8 people to do this quiz. Those that are tagged cannot refuse.
C. Continue this game by tagging 8 other people.

n since SAZLEEN AKA ms.sexy nv say cannot tag her back, i will tag her back jus for de sake of it.
which translates, i was tagged by her. i think.. AKU? hahahha!!!

SAZLEEN!
nicholas
joanna? (haf u deleted ur blog? )
germainee
audrey?
INEZ!
mellisa (my god-sis)
rachel KOH. muhaha =D am i evil or wad? =/

START!

1. What have you been doing recently?
; dreamin

2. Do you ever turn your cell phone off?
;when de batts flat, or when i wanna be alone.

3. What happened at 10am today?
;in a traffic jam

4. When did you last cry?
; err.. i kinda made myself promise i wont ever cry since like ... ages.. and i have'nt (=

5. Believe in fate/destiny?
;yes n no.

6. What do you want in your life now?
; erm. GOD, family to always remain as it is. of coz my beloved frens n god-family. n hehe XXXX.

7. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains or just put up your hood?
;i jus walk in de rain hoping someone will come by to shelter me (= ok, tts crap. later kena struck by LIGHTNING!! >.<

8. What's your favourite thing to do on the bed?
; wads de bed for!?! SLEEP LAH. O.o

9. What bottoms are you wearing now?
;berms.

10. What's the nicest things in your inbox?
inbox is empty. wrong timing leen dearie. jus delete everything =PP

11. Do you tend to make the relationship complicated?
;no relationship luh wallao. wth.

12. Are you wearing anything borrowed from anyone?
;no, unless u wan me to borrow someone's bra? =X kidding!

13. What was the last movie you caught?
james bond-Quantum of Solace.

14. What are you proud of?
;aint gonna be proud of anything except GOD.

15. What does the oldest text msg in your inbox say?
;pop-out by sony ericsson : no messages. *disappear

16. What was the last song you sang out loud?
;erm. either disturbia or crush.

17. Do you have any nicknames ?
;not telling u.

18. What does the newest text say?
;argh!

19. What time did you go to bed last night?
;ZzZZzzz

20. Are you currently happy?
;yes n no. err. haha!

21. Who gives you the best advice?
;GOD. family frens(=

22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can?
; i hate whipped cream btw . -_-

23. Who did you talk on the phone last night?
KELAOSHI! =D

24. Is something bugging you now?
; hell, yeah.

25. Who was the last person to make you laugh?
;HAHAHA. crap!! my dad!! shitos!! LOLX XD

*laxxx luh leen. i love u so much! xD not lesbian hor. laxxxxxxxxxxxxx...........

2008-11-28T19:04:00.001+08:00

dunno y im so tired.. sianz..
sazleen tagged claudia.. but i dunno if its my claudia or her other friend... see wad she say first. if its me i will say i REFUSE! xDD but i'll still do it luhhh.. frens muhh!! hahahas XD CHEER UP LEEN!! I LOVE YOU LOADS AH!! <333333

2008-11-25T23:55:00.000+08:00

sometimes, even being alone, is not too hard to ask rite? by y do i still not haf it??

LEAVE ME ALONE PLS.

i kena booked on 18dec! byy LIMMY AKA lamey n JOANNA!! hhahas. den i kena book by mel on dunno when.

whyouhwhy did XXXX not book me?? hahhas.
*ignores =P

mel is loved!!! x333

tmr will be a new beginning,
arent new beginnings sp,ong a little tad too fast?? haha =P.

BASHES. =/

2008-11-24T15:51:00.000+08:00

i dont wanna give a fuck care of who you are,
i dont wanna give a fuck care if I love you,
i dont wanna give a fuck care even if u cared for me rite now,
i dont wanna give a fuck care if you even bother,
i dont wanna give a fuck care if u appreciate me,
i dont wanna give a fuck care if u hate me,
i dont wanna give a fuck care wad u think,
i dont wanna give a fuck care if u r alone,
I DONT GIVE A FUCK CARE ABOUT YOU!!
enough!! i dont wanna keep viewing ur profile,
i had enough of thinking about you day after day.
I DONT wanna get slapped n bashes looking after you!
I WANT TO MOVE ON!! i dont wan u to reciprocate some fake thing! i dont even want to be ur friend!!! I DONT WANT TO KNOW YOU! i dont want to rmb you!! i dont wanna meet you!!! not even after ur a levels r over!! I DONT WANT YOU!! stop trying to be nice! stop acting as if u dunno i like you. STOP IT!! its fake! n we both noe it. so lets jus stop it. i dont wanna cry every nite thinking abt wad i did. it hurts. n i dont wanna bother to anymore.
jus stop it pls. its bad enuff getting emotionally n physically hurt. jus pls. disappear frm my life.
i cant eat rite,
i cant sleep rite,
i cant write rite,
I CANT EVEN THINK rite!!
my whole world is revolving around you, you stupid piece of.. argh nvm. lets jus forget everything. i noee i still care, de physical wounds say it all. jus let it be a reminder of how i f-ing feel abt u. i noe i still love. but i dont care. i will pretend tt u dont even exist, even if fcuk u r still in my heart. im gonna lie to myself. im gonna pretend as if tis feeling doesnt exist...

2008-11-22T13:31:00.000+08:00

sheesh. ;
have been a wandering muter since i woke up tis morning. i miss gwen. like, really REALLY miss gwen. i was talking abt her to my parents tis morning n i was so sad when i realised tt i only had a few months left wif her. sobsob..
anws, my cousins n granparents r here. i would be v v v happy if i din view someones profile. i din even wanna view his profile.. i was jus floating n i chanced upon his profile. n i tot i had long forgotten abt him. i din even wan to be his friend anymore. i got into hell lot of shit n i jus din wanna like 'intrude' his happy n perfect life now. i cant haf a perfect life, so i jus shld forget him n live my own 'perfect' life right? n i was so happy living my own world until i rmb-ed him. actually de truth is, i nv forgot him. n now, i feel like an idiot. a stupid idotic fat BITCH. im liking / loving 2 pple at de same time. GOD, pls slap me.
slap me pls.

unwelcome-d

2008-11-20T18:51:00.001+08:00

some pple jus haf these problematic gene called. EVIL & TROUBLEMAKER chromosomes. cant say i blame them. *shrugs.

u noe, tis is jus so bloody irritating. friendster reduces my friends to a pathetic double digit. n den when i change to facebook, i have to add pple as my fren b4 i can view their profile. damnit!
n its like no point finding de damn profile cuz u still haf to add some physcho person.

like wth. -_-.

haha! my blog is so damn cool cuz there's no tagboard. cuz some pple dont grasp de meaning of keep-your-bloddy-damn-mouth-shut. (= so there... dun come disturb me . wanna disturb why dont u jus go find rihanna's disturbia song. go disturb urself or smth. if u end up in mental hospital better (= den dey can chain you like a dog.

wallao. i went out whole day. fun but abit tiring. haha!! my dads off!! like finally. his stupid collegues get him for de whole day n dun appreciate him. i wanna steal my dad outta their bitchole faces (= okay, except my dad prefers to work wif ryan. says he's a good subordinate. ok. wadever - haha ! (=

today i BIOH guys again. haha!!! usually most guys arent handsome. even those i like one. haha! but de current guy i like which i think is no... hmm... 4? lols. last likable guy liao la. i oso not sure. =P but he's cute lah. i not suitable for him. tts why i start staring at good-looking guys. =PPP ..
well, CRAP! i so wanna stalk this fella ok. -_-. i noe im some coarse lang female. its not an XX chromo thing. but like. its more of a claudia gene. haha!! my dad was super funny! (he's always funny). may b cuz my mom n bro arent so entertaining. though i love them jus as much. but you gotta admit. they arent entertaining. n their stomach is like pea size. my dad and i seem to have bottomless pitts for stomachs i tell u. but the amt of digested stuff is ... err.. a diff thing altogether. haha!! n i jus realise exercise is making me eat less! tts damn stupid. i wanna eat luh! like i dont give a damn abt XX feminist stuff abt being slim n all . I.. DONT.. CARE.. im diff n its good to be special! (=

ok enuff said. too much talk liao. i might as well write some book. sure winner i tell u. #1 best selling author.

from the back.
haha. byebye~

2008-11-19T20:35:00.000+08:00

jus screw friendster. like hell, i so know tt i dun go there often but dont give me that fucking crap ans tt u haf to delete my 150 + over friends n reduce de damn no. to a frieking double digit 16. or do u like tt no. so much? jus drive yourself off de cliff or something lah.
n im angry! im oso not sure at wad. or maybe im not sure whether im willing to say it. im kinda like , abit hanging there know..
talked to gwen for quite long. sigh. im so tempted to do something okay. like go stalk him or something. i really like love him n its so god damn disgusting. =P.
anw, gonna think about it. KAO LU. hah! i think i got de hanyupinyin wrong but who cares?

2008-11-18T16:28:00.000+08:00

ahaha. i walked my dog @ de botanical gardens today. came home n change den went off for swimming. FAGARD. my frieking timing is godamn SLOW. haha! but still under 4 mins. damn!!! this psycho mind of mine is frieking irritating!!! argh!! like wth!! den now i haf to improve timing. sheesh.

i still have 1 and a half month to train for my gold star. damn it! i dont even know where i put my cert for de gold swimming thingy.

shit. n now i think i haf to bloody retake. den de date will be diff!!! damnit.

im so damn pissed. n i wanna stay over @ my ggramps place okay. its jus tt wallao! alot of time become like no time like tt.

TAEKWONDO!! woo~ i so love it man. hahah!! anw, gonna study den its slack till evening!!

hmm. i think i need to find some other enjoyable activity. (=

its youyouyouyouyouyouyou i love! XXXX XXXX XXX XXXX!! (= iloveyououhman!! X)

2008-11-14T14:50:00.002+08:00

its funny how all storms in my lif have turned into a breeze, i hope i did this correctly (=
aft all, no point being miserable right? so despite harsh circumstances, i still managed to have faith in god? (= haha(= therefore, i will trust him in wadever he is planning for me. cuz right now, besides my ultimate goal of following gods every command and being his servant, there is nothing more i want then *him* (ahem!) yeah wadever. i noe he's a homosexual and i noe he's 13 yrs older then me. but he's not that un-reachable type. so... ....

hahaha (= i mean like. i hope i can change him even if he doesnt reciprocate my feelings (which are, currently, super duper wavelike crashes of emotions) , i dun really mind, n hope he can at least be my fren. (=

its okay, wadever you do to me, i wont criticise u le. wadever u do, i will still believe n put my faith in god, i wont fall, cuz he gave me family n frens. n also, my very favourite form teacher. so, if u wanna join hands wif de devil den good luck!! BLEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH xPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP. (=

byebye. =DD
P.S claudia is sick, v v sick. she woke up tis morning n lost her voice =P.

*yutong is v v v loved(= im talking to her noww (=

2008-11-11T11:54:00.000+08:00

reasons y claudia is so damn happy.
1. new phone
2. hols are for 2 wks (=
3. JOANNA CHAN LAI CHENG IS BACK BACK BACK!! XD
4. i felt the feel of someones hand (=

okay. its too much TOO MUCH XPP.. enough said.

PLANS ;
apologize to nich cuz he apologized to me alr.
chloe and my outing (=
slack

kay, im talking crap AGAIN! argh! im in a need og getting OUTTA the holiday mood!! i need to REVISE! n GO TO THE LIBRARY AND ACT LIKE GUAI KIA. its so fake i tell u.
muhaha. 'sides the family scene, my life is jus so damn FAKE. FAKE to de sick core. like yucksyucks. now u noe wad i mean by DOUBLE MOOD NOT = TO SPLIT PERSONALITY.
fcuk. i tell u im trying not to be vulgur is exactly how it shld be ASSHOLE. HYPOCRITE BASTARD LEECH AND LIAR AND SO FUCKING CHILDISH!! SO JUS GO TO H E L L DUMBASS!
like liar liar pants on fire!! ARGH!! so pissed.. so ARGHH!!!!! i need to calm down. like NOW.
ugh. forget it.
i wanna meet wif jo asap, go to jurong east library and chill and study AND AND AND talk. gonna chiong last weeks hoomework today. woo~ like hell lot. haha!! =D

9 days of not posting.

2008-11-07T16:47:00.001+08:00

sheesh. i juz heard some very bad news today.. tt news oso brought some pity larrr.. ouh, u know wad.. some pple are juz born assholes... n im like abit wth...? but wadever lar. one more year and im out. so wads de point of holding back rite? -_-.

i cant believe tt there are adults out there that are so bloody childish, and im not about to name who. sides, theres no point pressing the issue.. anw, the fact is tt i did NOT claim im mature or more superior then others. in fact, i've been like demoralizing myself. so are you trying to say that im contradicting myself?? ok even if i did. wad kind of !@#$#@. ok i dun wanna talk abt it alr. it makes me angry frustrated n upset. seriously u pple are just abusing your authority, not that i have anything to say about it. SO THERE! im mature n sensible enuff tt im not gonna press it any further bcoz there is NOTHING LEFT. so im going to leave it CUZ IT DOES NOT MATTER ANYMORE AND CUZ I AM MORE MATURE AND UNDERSTANDING. wait till end of next year n im gonna screw your ass UPSIDE DOWN AND INSIDE OUT. =P!

tis whole week is juz like play n play n nothin else. sian. need to start catching up on school work frm next wk onwards! =( RIHANNA is like coming to singapore and i cant go cuz its going to be CROWDED!! i hate crowds - like seriously... >:-(
anw, yst went to my gramps hse to chill. den cuz i sold my phone away( at $100 BUCKS :D ) to get my new phone tmr. so went over i had to take my dads phone cuz he said i get lost easily so i needed de phone. went to my gramps hse and SOMEBODY called ;D i missed it though and returned de call later. =DDDD den he said he wanted my dad to do smth to him .. so i told him tt his phone was wif me and tt he isnt in the office and i kept apologizing. den he was sooo nice n sweet about it. he was like. 'S okay nvm dont worry about it (= (= (= (=

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHxDDDDDDDDDD

kay im gg mad.
as for de one i protect, i really dont know. its like maybe not meant to be or smth. i only know one thing. and that is i really dont waant to change de waay i feel about him. and that though someone else is coming in, i feel that though i may love de person more then him, he wont ever leave my mind and thoughts, and no one can replace him no matter how potent the other persons presence maybe. and thats a promise. i know i havent been able to do many things, probably things you are'nt even aware of. i only know that you cant ever be able to comprehend everything i have done for you and probably juz think tt im a jerk and a total liar but it doesnt really matter, at least not any more cuz i know its nothing but the truth and i cant help it if thats de way you feel. iits noot ur fault if u dun want to acknowledge and appreciate, and i wont EVER blame you for that. but one things for sure, and that is, u can only be u and i can only say that its juz difficult to let go n forget though new things are always coming in.

the thing is i nv really noticed cuz someone was so tightly wrapped in my thoughts. perhaps i really did let him go. but i nv really help him in de first place.

2008-10-29T15:04:00.000+08:00

ok, so i have'nt blogged for the past like 13 days. its an unlucky number but i dont really care. so went to school and left at like 1115 cuz i sprained my right shoulder blades. fuck. pain lar. but i jus tolerate till bio class. so, im promoting to sec4! whee(= im so damn happy(= but im scared i cant keep it up liddat. later wanna walk my dog.. (= muhhaaha.. have tution den pick up de bloody printer that konks out half of the time. (from service) muhahaha. i miss joanna and i saw her today! iloveher(= alot!! and i finally managed to like give felicia her letter... (= i received a letter from nich today. at first i was furious enough not to open it. den aft some consideration, i tot, fine if he can alr write such things on his blog, it shouldnt really bother me. and since i alr told myself i needed to calm down b4 i explode and jump to conclusions, i needed to control that bloody "hot-tempered-ness" of mine. so ok fine i opened it, and de scence of me evaluting this particular scene, jacq tot this scene was pretty hilarious. so ok fine wadever -_-
so ok fine, nich apologised for his behavior, and i have yet to apologize mine.
so currently, i need to write a letter to nich and one to my dearest joanna(= den i need to do my e math statistics things.. blahbah.. cant wait for extended curriculum to end sia..
jeez.. i am in a need of going out... =( sians sia... (=

2008-10-17T15:38:00.002+08:00

blahs.

tmr haf no school can stay at home to slack (=

yays. exams ok liao. nightmares over can go out(= cant wait for school to faster end!! faster end can faster go out and i wan go out wif melissa to go shopping!! esp for new urban male bag sia! (= i need more $$$.

oh ,

for those ask me why i accomplish my 'the list' things den delete and never jus strike right, is cuz finish alr den remove why muz let the whole world see wad i previously wanted?

; maybe

i will strike luhs. i love tis blog like aft so long still not sians liddat so i plan to keep until finish jc or poly luh. i wan keep for very long(= university like not so sure. =( i wan to get my drivers lisence. 2 more years ok!! (=

sighhh..

i miss yu tongg. =(

REPEAT. shit../

2008-10-16T16:34:00.000+08:00

wth. my results are like satisfactory den not satisfactory... REPEAT? like wad de hell.. sians luhh.. im jus in a bad mood today.

2008-10-15T17:18:00.001+08:00

hmm.. how shall i put it?? im not exactly pleased and satisfied with my results luhh. ok i will say im RELIEVED. its tt de correct word?

ugh.

my vocabulary is so LIMITED. shucks.

well,
im pretty surprised i din fail my chinese, but not exactly surprised tt i failed my a maths either. im not exactly sure whether i want it or not, but i think i should be capable of better results. sigh. i HAVE to start revising for the holidays in order to catch up with all my revision.
well, im EXTREMELY happy wif my humanities, (i shocked mr.tan though he wasnt being very nice about the impressed thingy.) i must say that i have pput in effort in that one. but im not going to be complacent though. still need to revise and work harder. much much harder.
as for english, well screw it i was one mark away from an A so im not very happy about that.
as for e math, im pleasantly surprised at the fact that i scored a remarkably high B4 and i really wasnt expecting that to happen. (= so for that, im happy (=

im pretty disappointed with lit, though i must say its really got me geared and all fired up for an A1 for O levels. (=

im preparing for the shock both good or bad for tomorrows science papers. i really hope to get B's though im not really expecting it, and i dont deserve it. =(

however, considering these results, i have alr cleared de obstacle for promotion to sec 4, and i wont say i have done relatively well, i'll say all boderline passes are really wad i deserve, i mean more then wad i actually deserve. SIGH.

im pretty surprised im going to sec 4 next year, my moms only gonna be 36 and thats jus amazing (= haha!!! im really excited and im gonna put in my 150% effort and more for next year, and tis time, i mean it cuz its o levels, hence i really need to buck up.

SIDENOTE::
nich was super pissed today at his art work, i mean as his good friend, i feel both irritated and angry luh. irritated as in he was EXTREMELY not going to calm down. and angry wif MDM lim cuz shes so unresonable and im not saying this to like garner support frm nich??? i hated her since sec2?? i warned nich tis will happen but hiyah. i only know him too well.

anyway, cheer up nich!! i support you all de way. i know ur upset, but bo pian. its life man. it cant always be fair know. its got real disappointments and i know its frustrating. but hey, jus talk to god or us about it. you know u can count on your friends ;)

nich and fel YUE me to go out today. but i told them with this kind of results, (though my parents are secretly happy that it wasnt so disastrous) i cant really even step out of the house.
movie, shopping anyone?? haha. nich and fel are on my list. (=

P.S anyone likes werewolves and wants to be one?

contact me : claudia_see.jm@hotmail.com

2008-10-14T11:25:00.001+08:00

a lil help pls?? (= click tis link thank you. (=

http://world2.monstersgame.co.uk/?ac=vid&vid=31119044

2008-10-14T11:05:00.001+08:00

sore throat luh. damnit. yst alr quite bad liao den now worse cuz i nv take medicine.. sian.. den now my throat like super raw can. yucks, den drink hot water like worse like that.. ok den now i have to look under johnnys name.. ugh! wadever..
wallao results will be out tmr! i dunno whether i will do well or not and its super irritating to wait for de results!! =(

my room is in need of a good packing cuz it looks like there was a bomb explosion in my room can. -_-
im werewolf claudia!!! (= (= (= (= (= (=
i think facebook is damn interesting can!!! (= (= but seriously, werewolves are cool (= hahaha =DD
oh god, pls let my results NOT shock me(in a bad way, good way also can(= )tmr... plspls let me have de results i wanted or at least all past luh.. (=

http://hqnccsea.blogspot.com ((=
byebye.

2008-10-13T09:35:00.000+08:00

whee.. ok so i will be going to school in an hour or so.. hmms.. okok so i left like little time to blog and bathe.. haaha(= i dunno whether to be excited for the trip or not but ok luh. and wth someone ask me say http://hqnccsea.blogspot.com is like gonna interest me, no offence but its like all for cader officers only! =(
okok.. de good news is i get to see jo in a few hours(= haha! (=

I. need. a. long. break. like seriously luh..
ok i wanna be a werewolf(= muhaha..
kk im gonna move on to facebook, bye, friendster! (=

2008-10-12T18:15:00.000+08:00

muhaha.. exams are over. =,=yipees(=
so i went out wif nich,jo,ger and fel. (= love them all. (= den went off to vivo to meet maine(= watched eagle eye! (= its not bad actually(= love it(=im happy and my happiness is only gonna last till wed. hoho~
kk.. we watched at 1830 till bout 2045 liddat. den maine and chloe went home and i went back to clementi. stayed over at mama hse next day jus kept sleeping till one plus? ok den left there on sat at 1530 liddat. reached home sleep some more. till 2030 again.muhaha.. den woke and cook my own dinner watch tv until super late like 1 plus. =/ slept at 0130.. heehee=D
i realize i keep sleeping man! (= gonna play sims now(= later.. yawns i wanna sleep again. cooking for my dog =P
later going vivo. shall blog later or maybe tmr. going to 2SIR (= yays (=

2008-10-08T18:30:00.001+08:00

this is jus mad.

M.A.D maddddd..

why de hell am i going to your friendster profile again and again? no more bullshit please.

half a seond alone is not going to make up one day with you.

screwed.

a math and chem tmr. i pray for de best i love my friends. screw love life.

2008-10-03T12:05:00.002+08:00

crap..

today FINALLY i came wif de sword to kill de most horrible and awaited paper MATHEMATICS PAPER 2! why oh why must dey put paper 2 first?????????????? demoralize me??? =(((

may i very kindly know who SET DE BLOODY HARD MATH PAPER??!?!?!
ok fine so maybe its not so hard, but its enough to kill me. mission accomplished. haha! alright luhs, maybe its tolerable(= i must have confidence in myself otherwise im never gonna succeed(=. ok so i think i'll pass but boderline liddat lor. (=

ok wadever- haha. ITS OVER! concentrate on other subjects. (=

music moves my world.

2008-10-02T19:46:00.001+08:00

HEARTBREAK.

i miss you.

2008-10-02T13:02:00.002+08:00

dearest mernel,
i dont blame you for anything, though danielle and i are friends, i never really got to know you. But i wish you will be happier where ever you are right now, cause now you know, so many people love you whether they knew you or not. its sad to see you gone and not walking around school with your friends anymore. Gina is really upset about her loss. you meant so much to her. ignore the eddys ex ok? whether you knew it or not, comprehended or not, its not your fault. you had your own difficulties and ways, theres no right or wrong. theres only YOUR decision and we will all respect it.(= its a tragic loss to all of us. we will all dearly miss you and pray and hope you have a better life ahead. May god bless you, mernel. (=

she loved pink, so i wrote it in pink. i din really know her, only her best friend danielle. but i really hope danielle doesnt feel guilty. and i hate all those who insulted mernel. not cause im kaypoh or wad. but cuz its totally not respecting someone who has already passed on. she must have had her reasons and no one should blame her and let her have some peace. she did not have any when she left so why add on to it. i dont feel pity cuz it will make her feel bad, but im sad about her loss. we all are. SO SCREW ALL DE CRAP ABOUT HER FORCING EDDY TO JUMP BITCH. your boyfriend was not forced, he could choose. mernel din put a gun at his head and asked him to jump. if u missed him so much, why dont YOU jump and we will all start making comments about your bloody screwed up life? and then we'll see whether you are happy about it. then u can come tell us whether it felt good, just like wad u did to mernel.

some pple are just born idiots.

sigh. exams were all pushed back by a day. =( face it back to reality sia. its so damn sian. cheer up claudia youcanmakeit(= self-motivation!!! =D

8 more days to freedom and 13 more days to my doom!!

wishing everyone good luck for whatever exams ahead of them.

be it, o-level, a-level, n-level, uni, poly, PSLE. SCREW ALL OTHER EXAMS, all de best to everyone.

all de best,
do your best,
and
GOD will do de rest. (=

2008-09-30T15:05:00.001+08:00

haha.. too lazy to blog de past few days. bzie prep work for exams huh- i seioursly dun wanna talk about EOY SS paper ok ='( sobbs. lols. okok today history paper was OK luhs. im not saying anything. haha(=

nich is bloody hell not telling me anything can!?!?! =( i had a great bday thanks EVERYONE! lemme NOT tell uu de special person who FORGOT my bday. lol. nvm its ok since he wished at last minute . haha(= tmr childrens day is like so my day(= haha. today is my moms bday. LOL
speaking of which, i went to make ic today. at first i wasl ike sian, muz wait blahblah. all de crap. although i was thankful my mom went there wif me cuz its like everytimes shes around or my dads wif me, its like alot less lonely for me(= so went in and its all so fast luh!! haha. de lady at de counter was staring at my mom and me cuz firstly our age gaps only 20 yrs (yes my mom is 35) and we were like joking about each other and as USUAL she was teasing me at just about everything. i bet my face was like -_- haha. but my moms used to it(= i wish my mommy happy bday(= i gave her DE BEST PRESENT SHE COULD EVER ASK FOR ONE WEEK EARLIER FROM HER 20th BDAY AND ITS ME!!! (=

lols.. cuz im born a week earlier den my mom.(= haha. cant wait till aft exams man! den doomsday jus a few days away from being free. =( i miss someone=( ouhiloveyou. (= haha. okk STUDY HARD CLAUDIA. i can make it, through christ, definitely i will(=

swap bags wif mel(= love it! NEW URBAN MALE. haha. gonna but a num bag aft exams. see if i can pass through sec.3 first(= love it yeah(= haha.. plspls god help meeeeeeeeeeeee i know u will.....

2008-09-20T20:22:00.000+08:00

haha.. its past 8 and im missing someone. lols(= i woke up at 0645 and my dad barged into my room, turned off my air conditioner and he was like "WAKE UP CADET ITS 0730 UR LATE!!!" ok wadever dad.. i jus so happen to look at my handphone thats why i knew it was 0645 not funny dad.

then i went for my oral. wasnt late, jus nice. oral was not as bad as it turned out to be luh. haha! hmms. met yutong. talk-ed rubbish.. met joanna.. had hell lot of homework(sucks). den went back home blahblah. my dad went out to get me a drink cuz its so hot- haha! so im taking de time to blog. hmss.. wont be long. shall elab next time. talking to yutong now(= i love senior specialist course so very much! (= 3 more days to my birthday. not that im v excited anw, hz rmb ur promise!!! ** pls wish me happy birthday its de only thing i could ever hope for!! (= *grins. bye.

2008-09-19T13:34:00.000+08:00

kay.. so i havent blogged for this long... im sick and its like pre-exam stress i think? tmrs oral and it seriously sucks -_- hmms. i bought new moon, and i personally felt that new moon was a better book then twilight(= oops. sry nich(= i bet nich nearly cried reading it ok! i was ... fine luhs. jus a book anw. lols. ouh crap crap CRAP. exams are in a weeks time and im damn nervous ok! god pls let me do well god pls let me do well(= hey.. i jus realised my face is as white as crap luh(although im not beautiful, im not even average! im ugly!!) well now, i will but eclipse ONLY aft exams. after exams claudia, study hard(= growls* lol. oh i din eat dinner last night and breakfeast was a minor portion cuz im sick and when im sick my appetitites like one tenth of my original appetite. and my moms like wondering "girl, you should be sick till you lose 20 kilos!" honestly, i haf no intention on cutting down my appetite. but de recent studying-for-exams has made me lose 5kilos so far. and no i dont like it, its not good. im tired -_-

what do i really want?

2008-09-15T19:13:00.001+08:00

yeah~~ im happy today had no probs in school(esp wif math) haha.. (= so im generally happy(= din blog yst, too tired and bzie reading TWILIGHT!! =D at first i was pretty disgusted at nichs obsession wif tis book. de cover din seem to fascinate me one bit. of coz i read the back part. hmm.. a girl who's in love wif a vampire? interesting. i must say all these things really do fascinate me. like blackheart and all de wierd wierd creatures. EXAMPLE would be SOMEBODY who told me tt there was this show tt was gonna come out, about blackheart, in love wif this human woman name jes. WHICH WAS TOTALLY A LIE cuz there was no such storyline.

what utter disappointment.

anws, i bought that book and have completed it, much to my amazement as well.(= not that it has kept me from studying, i cant wait to see the movie!(= i certainly hope that the next few books i buy, will be as entertaining and perhaps more then tis one.(=

hmm, studies, seriously dun wanna talk about it. moodwise, its alot better thanks joanna(=
err. about me, i still need some recovery time aft i read this fiction book which is truly amazing(= its touching, basically. much better then we living pple=(

i wanted to blog alot, but i must say, less is, indeed, more. (=

ususally when i talk non sensical stuff, with astounishing good vocabularly and of coz my favourite, a twitch of sarcasm and alight irritation of voice, accompanied wif, unmistakenably words, phrases or sentences wif the use of much repitition, is either
1) to emphasise on my certain point
2)to express my inmost thoughts as much cant understand
3)im unquestionably irritated
4)im simply not in a mood, but forced to, blog

(=

so simply, im not such a difficult person to comprehend right? (=
i jus haf many moods that pple cant interpret. does that count? *grins.

on a lighter note(as it alr is).
my birthday is in a weeks time. has anyone remembered or rejoiced? first apparently very few and second apparently not. well. i dont expect much enthusiam in someone, esp me in particular to celebrate my birthday. as a matter of fact, theres only one special person i would like to highlight, which shall remain in my own context(=

i only want that person to rmb my bday(= of coz, i doubt he would even know.
hmm.. will he even bother to type or at least draft a simple msg like, happy bday to me? i will leave that question to be ans on that very day itself. so much for being NOT "overly worried".

shucks. :/

complicancy

2008-09-12T18:14:00.002+08:00

you know, sometimes i really wonder why true friends are never really true friends. and they jus hurt you as and when they pls then they go back to you again wif de words "im sorry" and dey jus expect u to forgive like tt. although i must, i find that its extremely unfair aan unjust to do so repeatedly, and then where's de importance of forgiving???

and why do i feel thid pinch in me? (it has NOTHING TO DO WIF LOVE OK.) as in smth to do wif.. aiyahh. say also no use right. den i think of someone i wan to talk to but in de end theres no one there? haf u ever felt u need help but dont want it? ouhfuck plspls i dun wanna feel tis way=( haiz. anw, today was totally less stressful once u haf completed ur work(=

so tt aside, is itself a happy note(=. and to rmb my rankkk(= and be happy abt it cuz NCC annual dinner is coming very soon(((((= and i get to wear my uniform. THERANK THERANK(= (=

ahahahs =DD ouhh...(= and i'll see someones jealous face. fuck off woman!(= hahaha!!=DD

another happy note, i haf to say tt i can make myself happy(= so had de usual day and kelaoshi is coming back on mon. fuck. i totally dun wanna see him. as for nicholas, i keep fighting and arguing cuz to tell u de truth, i personally am irritated wif him alr. jus tt i dunno how to break it to him yet. may be he reads my blog. so nich, when u see tis, i dunno whether we are still good friends or wad. but its damn hard, u know wad i mean?

lunched wif jiayi and jo today. carried my bag and it weighed like a ton. im tired and i still haf to study. fuckkk. sides, no schools tmr so means i haf to study even later. that thought jus kills me and dampens my mood. grats claudia. -_-. can i absolutely say im hoping to share my emmotional outbursts wif someone who wont spread it. shityou, YUTONGGGGGGGG=(((((
i wan toktok(=(=(= iluvyou. haha(=

a lil reminder for myself,
IM A STAFF SERGANT!!!
STAFF SGT CLAUDIA
STAFF SGT CLAUDIA!!!!! =DDDDDDD

2008-09-11T15:58:00.000+08:00

hmm.. ok so wad de fuck do you want from me??

anw, i talked to yutong for some time last night. everything we said there was private&confidential. hor yutong, HOR. hahhas. (= im so bloody stressed up and its only secondary school luhhs.. later still need to study and all.

ahh.. i wanted to type a long post, but my mind is jus so clogged up -_-.

bye.

someone pls enlighten me. thank youu

2008-09-10T16:08:00.001+08:00

sometimes i really wonder why things dont work out the way its planned.. hmm.. -_-

anyway, chem today was really boring but fruitful la. im afraid if i dont do well tis year, i will drop out from pure science! =( now thats sad.

i really dont know wad to say luh. lets jus put in in the way that im v v tired and im unsure too. need to read bible!! =D anw, i wrote a will!!!

hah. i was listening to zombie n realise actuallly got tis tinge of sadness luh. its MAD.

i feel really like de normal rollercoaster again? someone pls enlighten me. cuz prob till exams are over, i will so not be myself luhh... sian can.. =( wah piang eh. i know got improve luh. and i was never ever stressed in my life till tis year.

ohfuck. *POINTS MIDDLE FINGER*. claudia needs to buck up. claudia should stop dreaming. nothing to blog. im jus depressed. fuck once more. **

2008-09-09T15:59:00.001+08:00

like wth. damn tired can. -_- arghhh!! i like cannot sleep cuz no time!!!!!! wtfwtfwtfwtf!!!! for those who know me well enough, yeah im damn vulgar. but its not on purpose ok. hahahah.. im not gonna ever put back my tagboard. cuz some pple jus dunno how to appreciate this privillege! (=

anws, to WILLIAM, GOVIND and JOSHUA. wth can. u r not abit funny lor. thanks so much for getting yiwei and i into trouble ok. we both werent the ones to BREAK DE BLOODY WINDOW. by throwing the ncc book. jus pass out frm ssc only den break public property. being "hao lian" is alot better then being so immature lor. so now wad de fuck is ur problem!?!?! mam mam my fucking ass la! jus go to hell can. super super stupid .. at least use ur smart brains GOVIND. and stop thinking we are so good when we are NOT. fairfield, i feel has been too arrogant. let me tell u all this, even if we are, STOP BEING SO ARROGANT LAR. wallao -_-. and to think i hated hq ncc like mad. i think now i hate my school unit and love hq lar.

hah- i was browsing through friendster when i pass darren lim. which sounded familiar den i rmbed it was my PC for spec course. den i browse through some more, i found tis cadet cpt whom i dunno how to spell his name -_- lols. den whenn i went to see his blog, i found all de other cadet cpts! (= and i realise dey werent very diff frm us. but they nv said so. hahs-_-.

OHHHHH!!!

my IC de slip come lee!!!! =DDDDDD finally im a singapore citizen. soon =PP my father keeps calling me an illegal immigrant. -_-. hahahahs.. but he lost his IC b4. haha! NOW HU WAS DE IDIOT HU TOLD ME THAT U LOSE UR IC ON DE 4TH TIME CANNOT BECOME SINGAPORE CITIZEN!?!?!??!?! someone pls own up leh. hahaha=DD friek la! i din believe lor. -_-
BIO SPA TODAY!!!!!!!!!!! I TOTALLY FRIEK OUT LAR!!! i got a curve den when i glance at de side, sam got straight line!!! i was like wth!?!?!?! i kena curve lehh!! panic!! den i forgot how to count rate too!!! FUCK! in de end i was like panicking. den mr. firhad look at me like o.O. relax relax. LOLS. den in de end it was not so bad but i scared i screw up in minor areas. -_- IS REST DAY FOR ME!! (= later do hist. but im not worried. im worried for math. -_-

HISTORY ROCKS!!! ~~geography~~ =D hahahs. mr.tan played zombie and i think its quite a nice song except for the middle part la. (=
i feel really sorry for bing hui cuz he din make it as a senior specialist. cheer up luhhs. (= now only got william govind and me. but wads de point? 2 of them aft ssc break window. left only me. fuck.

hoping for a better tmr.

2008-09-08T18:08:00.003+08:00

im frieking tired!!! -_-. i pratically look like a zombie and my whole day in school was practically spoilt!! =(

anws, i did all my homework in a short span of 2 days! (= whereby my brain got fried and culd not think or do any maths at all. (= de effect lasted to today, where my brain is still fried, and hence its kicking in some side effects on my physical and emotional me =D.

church yst! im realllll happie(= talked to god n everything.. i still get pissed quite easily, but, yeah. (=

ALL MY HOLS IN DOING ALOT OF MY WORK WAS TOTALLY RIPPED OFF!! >:-( mr. ganesan and ms. ng claim that their homework werent requested to be handed in today. wtf -_-. anws, 7 pple din come today!!!! :/ hahah! its totally wth luh! hahahs. if dey were trying to escape getting scolded for not doing h/w, its so totally wasted cuz everything falls in order for our convenience and not to theirs. (= maybe its totally not in their comprehension(=

no more trg for me till hols!!! =D lalalalala~~ maybe, jus MAYBE, i will go for cadet officer course. see first. hahahas~ im still considering.

kelaoshi reservist for one week! argh! means no one to talk to, lesson gonna be boring! =( i miss my hamburger can. >.<>

wahahahah~ de happy/moody me. need to do homework and revise for BIO SPA tmr. shucks how i hate life. -_-

2008-09-06T23:43:00.003+08:00

imma a tired girl!! i managed to chiong most of my work and now i feel like my brains fried!!! >.<>

there's church tmr!! (= aft not gg for more den one week, i feel super drained!!! i need to go back to the heart of worship!!!!!

take me to the heart of worship, LORD.
hahs. i admit i have not been praying since i returned from ssc. =( i admit ok.. i feel super empty and moody inside.. i so hope to go church tmr and RENEW ALL my strengh sia! hahhs... AKU is I in a super hao lian wayyy!! hahahs.

its almost 12 and claudias a naughty girl who is way past her curfew and was frieked out and lunged her matress into her mommy and daddys room to sleep tonight =P.

yea i know its strange but im frieked out ok! >.<>
hahahahahs.. im still in love with you #####!!!! hahahahs. but i will NEVER be ur gf. hah. although u 100% dun wan me aniway.

CHEEENAAA!!!!!! i miss audrey n wish her happy belated! =)

3 more weeks to CLAUDIA'S birthday pple!! muz rmb! hz! dun ask me for my bday for nothing!!!! >.<>

i bet i know his reaction luhh! it will look something like that o.O

LOLS. bye and nights pple.

i so <3>

admiring de nightlights and dreaming you were here right beside me.

2008-09-06T15:28:00.001+08:00

happy birthday AUDREY dearest!! <33333333>

hahahs i sms de moment i woke up n bout to leave for east coast =PP..
yst i went to lab park wit my doggie(= shes tired =PP.

gonna chiong finish my work today!! (=

ily still!! ######!!! (= (= make it fast fast one! downloaded lots of things into my phone!! (=

2008-09-04T12:24:00.001+08:00

whoo~ i received good news yst.. =)) ohh aft i blogged and all.. kinda calmed down.. den i FINALLY smsed some one my rank acheived. guess wad he replied...

me: hey, i got staff..
*****: Haha! Congrats! But its expected la...lol.
and i was like =).. lols..

im like super happy when i received his sms can? =))

den at bout 8plus. i plugged my headphones in again change de song to dance floor anthem by gc. den i made it up to full volume. i even pressed the headphones aagainst my ears. it was seriously super loud. and super shiok. i think im addicted to that luhhs. Hoho~ actually can laugh bout tis now, but i was seriously nearly in tears, gonna break down. den i had to think of him. how i promised to be strong... i changed it to apologize by one republic.. and i culd not take it.. i broke down and cried on my bed.. i mean like. that song really had some meaning. its really to late to apologize. i mean, theres no point..

watched constantine.. i so love de show man! right on top of de list next to ghost rider. next, im gonna watch kallang roar. kelaoshi told me it was super good n i shld watch it... =) so i shall. =) anws, i was super hungry when i woke up at 11 =P. i wanted to eat rice and bee hoon and stuff it into my mouth when its really hot and burn myself, but i got really full just eating 1 packet of bee hoon. i oso dunno why little bit only full . like cant even get up. so i turn on my laptop and blog=P
my doggie, nala go and bite newspaper!! >:-( i got angry cuz i really not in good mood tis past few days. so i use another newspaper beat until i tot she gonna cry.. den i end up sit next to her n cry also... i think she knows i also at the verge of dying le. den she din crawl and paw over me like she usually does. shes so sweet can. she put her paw on me and her head on my forehead like telling me everythings gonna be alright. and how i wished a person could do it to me. i mean if a dog can understand and listen and comfort me, wad more person? fuck!!! i joke w sazleen.. felt like telling her my probs.. but i have not yet luhhs. im damn sad seriously. esp when i talk alot w lots of repetition and no-meaning right, it means im damn depresssed le. haiz i seriously dunno luhhh.

2008-09-03T15:59:00.003+08:00

im frieking tired -_- n later haf to study =( wahhh sians
lalalalala~ i m like so thinking bout him can? =( ouhyououhyououhyououhyou. = (
hahs... im on a rollercoasteer yeahh~

im staff sgt claudiaclaudiaclaudia

i receive sms from him. i know ur stressed and all.
receive: what can i do to make it happen? u cant do anything. :%
my reply: i dont know what ur sms mean or ur smiley face. i only know baby. i think i dont know you anymore, even if i still did, its harder to understand you.

2008-09-03T10:02:00.000+08:00

everythings jus so screwed la >.<
im tired, EXTRMELY moody and super pissed.
yeah man. i dun give a f care bout u la.
u ask me why why. why not me. of cox not u la. CBCBCBCBCBCB!!!
argh!! >:( super unhappy! and there are pple who make it worse! =( i talked to jonana on de phone for like half an hour yst. i tink all tis is misunderstanding lor. like wth. im not even f-ing aware can. -_- yupps.

i dun think i owe u an apology, nor do u owe me one. let's jus say we are even.

yea.. i blasted music in my years yst AGAIN at night while sleeping. i feel so damn disgusted. :/
im frieking unhappy and u arent able to do anything about it.

i sms kelaoshi again. he have nt reply. i sms hz too. he oso hv not reply. haiz sian. i seriously miss all my cadets. rachel, timothy, samuel, bryan, joy, joanna, ger and farwin. i miss all of them alot alot. they are always de first ones in my mind when we talk bout ncc. den when i have probs, de frist pple i will think of beside my parents is, nich, kelaoshi, joanna, hz. etc. got one more. but i always have diff talking to him. im sure we know why.

when my ssc friends ask me why i would not want to be de guy i love de gf. i said beause i love him thats why i dun want to be wif him. seriously. long story. maybe i will blog about it another time la. i think aft my tuition i wanna go out and study. mayb my grandmas place. =)

jus created a new playlist. if ur wondering why my blog does not have a chatbox. de person who jus made me remove it will noe why =) n frmnow on i wont put tagbox le. =) but u pple can add me on msn if u want =) or e-mail.

im still looking for SSC TALKCOCK-SINGSONG GRP!! plspls faster add!!!!! @.@

oh one more thing. dont rip anything from my blog pls. its all original =)

tired -_-

2008-09-02T15:17:00.000+08:00

SENIOR SPECIALISTS COURSE 2008

ohh man!! im back frm senior specs!! ((: ssc rocks i tell uu!! :D:D:D:D i had a great time there (: i love my talkcock-singsong grp!! :D got 8 of us whole day talk nonstop! =P n clts kept looking at us like -_-. lols~ anw, i passed out as SSG!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D yeaaa man!~ u had no idea how FRIEKING happy i was when i received my landyard and no.3 & 4 rank wif cert! we happily marched back making so much noise!! ouhhhh all de memories!~
haha!! so happie huh-
i made friends wif this really funni guy at ssc ; Vijay! if i din spell ur name WRONGLY. =P whoo man~~ we really talk COCK sia~~ haha. we were talking about constipation and HANCOCK =PP shant elaborate:D im jus super happy! oh and next week my dog will turn 6 months. ((:

anw, sad part, i quarelled wif my god-dad yst. =( im super unhappy not really all pissed.
so de story goes smth like tis... :
for 4 days, at ssc, i only slept 9 hours in total. tt really made me groggy and everything. had lunch wif yiwei n em. den went home. i was seriously seriously tired. n yet i still BOTHERED to sms all my teachers happy teachers day. and like he jus jumped at things, i got pissed and den we quarelled. and im super unhappy about it. :/ soo.. yahh.. i really got damn frustrated wif everything. i was really like so pissed angry n tired.. my reaction was like : wth/ i mean like. f can, i jus came home, and u still like tt. super angry. den when i hung up on him, i felt like crying. its like. wads the f use. seriously. i sms kelaoshi he very happy for me (: i told him wad happened of cox. like almost sobbing. kelaoshi din hang up on me or wadever. he was v nice bout it. he was driving but still advise me not to be upset n all. den he encourage me to keep on going. den aft hang up i felt abit better of course, den i jus called my mum and told her de FULL WHOLE STORY. and ok, went for dinner slept. haiz. tmrs comp.

btw, when i came home from ssc, i scrolled to his name, and drafted a msg. it goes like tt,

###########!!!!!, guess wad! i got staff!! im super happy!!! :D r u proud of me? hahahhs... super happy nehhs! whoo~~ ... ...

of cos i stopped. and tt this stupid tot jus flooded my mind, that y shld i sms him? why is he always de first one to know? will he understand tis msg is very significant to me? will he even care? will he share my joy? perhaps he will delete it. ohh a thousand and one thoughts jus flodded along wif some tears luhh. den i deleted de draft, and drafted another to send to my gd friend, hz. also my clt but like i tot as friends he confirm will be happy for me one. unlike de other. so i sent him a sms. reply was positive and i told him i din wanna sms him, and hz was like. aiya... he not like tt one.. oh pls hz, not as if u dun noe him. anw, only kelaoshi, hz, and 'rents shared my joy. others din, wadthehell. im jus super not in de mood le.

aft my extra lessons today, on de way i home i felt tis sick n strange feeling in my gut. i wanted to spin i wanted to vomit. i felt so like usseless. i oso dunno why suddenly like tt again. i plugged my headphones, listened to those super noisy no-meaning songs and BLASTED them to full volume up my ears. it jus flooded my head and de hurt was there, but at least it wont be anywhere else. den i felt a lil better. i bought a coke zero, ice chilled. and drank all of it at one go. den i went to sleep.

i wanna noe why, if theres nothing left in this world, will you still be in my mind?

a lil poem to end it all off,

I love the way he looks at me,
it makes me go whee!!~

tis refers to NOT him cuz seriously, lots of problems are gonna arise once more, and tis time, i dunno how im gonna solve it.

if i can be stronger everyday, i wish i would have another lifetime. another feel, another life, another me so i can not jus be ME but i also can jus stop or pause time.

2008-08-28T21:30:00.000+08:00

there's no kindness in your eyes.

2008-08-21T16:51:00.000+08:00

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by.

Continue this game by sending it to other people.tagged by church fwen jenisse. not fun m'dear.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
ANS; uh. well in de first place im not attached am i?

2. If you can have a wish to come true, what would it be?
ANS; i dun need anything cuz wadever i need my god will provide(:

3. If you could be at one place right now, where would it be?
ANS; huh? right here? lols. okok. if really, den its right beside GOD.

4. Are you confused/worried as to what lies ahead of you?
ANS; NO. because it says in de bible do not be worried for i am wif u(:

5. What’s your ideal lover like?
ANS; thats very easy. de guy i like is given de acronym HAMBURGER. so well. de guy i like is my ideal lover. haha.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
ANS; i used to ponder 'bout tt. den i realised to me, its better to love someone.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
ANS; the thing is, i dun intend to be wif him. i intend to protect him(:

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what would you do?
ANS; got secretly one meh? orh, i will BREAK DEM UP. nola... haha i will let him be lor! he like good wad. den he will be happy(:

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
ANS; many things make me unhappy. god makes them good things.(:

10. What do you want most in life?
ANS; for HAMBURGER to be happy, to make god happy, to make many many pple noe bout god.

11. What would you want most now?
ANS; i wan a better realtionship wif god n my staff SGT good EOY results. for NOW

12. How do you see yourself in ten years time?
ANS; simple. tt is, my age +10yrs. :D

13. Who is the current most important person to you?
ANS; talking bout now? HAMBURGER.

14. what do you think about the person who has tagged you?
ANS; LAME.

15. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
ANS; im alr poor. but i'll be married but poor. cuz im rich in god. (:

16. Ig you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be?
ANS; ive alr got her. and thats NALA my 5 month old GOLDEN RETRIEVER.

17. What are one of those things which you would prefer not to do?
ANS; make HAMBUGER n GOD unhappy.

18. What kind of person do you think you are?
ANS; extremely stupid.

19. What do you define as a bad day?
ANS; when HAMBURGERS unhappy, no ncc sea or no church or wadever is a bad day is a bad day la! need reason one meh. siao. -_-

20. If you have to choose between love and friendship, which one would you choose?
ANS; when i haf relationship first den see. hoho~ :D

pple dun need do cuz i din haf fun doing tis.

2008-08-21T16:41:00.000+08:00

ok... lets see.. i have not blogged for de longest time. n im pissed yet happy at de same time. wth!?!?! ever since i deleted my previous 300 post long blog.. im not so active anymore. as if nothin much realli matters. tis thing is like jus so damn screwed -_-. jus go and die larhhh xDD aniway.. to NICHOLAS: thks for listening to all my damn probs wif no complains at all.. thanks for being my friend when i din want u to be(: i will always rmb uu. and im EXTREMELY sorry i forced u to say and recall such horrble incidents. its kinda like a heavy burden. n now i can relate better.

JONANANA: my darling pj!! (:ur always there to make me smile. my 'love' for u has grown day by day!! HAHAHA. my TWIN. :D but honestly. from when "i dont even know whether u r in school today" to "shes at national camp and i miss her so damn much" i guess our friendshipps like so damn good n i jus treasure it. I LOVE YOU!! =P

XIAO GURL: lil girlll!!! xPP thanks for listening to my probs when i dun ask u to. thanks for helping me secretly and all. all the LITTLE haha.. but big larhhh things u helped really one big THANKS frm me xiao girl! (: anyway we can still talk about JAP guys and TOMA. haha!! aniway. great to haf known all of u CRAZY pple. i will truly treasure u all(: even if its jus 3.

okok.. i had a super BADBAD day today alrite? argh! >:( lemme tell u guys abt it. tis teacher.. ok we'll call her EDUCATOR. lets name her ZZXX. she is so frieking irritating and annoying and makes me super PISSED OFF. long story. anyway! hrmp! felt like slapping her over de phone. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :D

yea i noe HZ. never kena demerit pts before. slap urself once more. muhahaha.

on a lighter note, I PASSED A MATH AND CHEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
oh my gosh!!!!!!!! super happie!!!! when i saw 21/30 for a math. i had to slap myself to be sure. Mr. Sng yi hern and i were screaming across our desks. his reaction made mr.ganesan laugh. hoho~~ i got second for chem but im still happy as onli 5 pple passed and i got 2nd for the class. 19/30. but lots of pple said it was difficult although i tot it felt ok jus tt i had few careless mistakes which could haf earned me 22/30!!! annoying! :( im slowly bucking up! :D and tis brings me to senior spec!!

senior spec 30aug-1sep.

ohhh man.. my whole weekend kena RIPPED OFF!. haha~ i hopw to come back with a staff SGT so tt i can better serve my unit(: i love ncc sea~~!! whee!!! i luv all of u bad or good!! hahaha. i love timothy chiang!!! =P my lil sec one boy hu always accompany like my butler liddat. BUTTler HAHAHAHA right timothy???? :D samuel yEOOO always lets me steal his food although i never steal large amts. hoho~ and girls like joy make my day((: n of coz my 2 most beloved ladies germaine and joanna. i love u both manymany!! haha! :DD

MUHAMMAD FARWIN BIN JEFFRIN!!! XDXDXD!! haha!! farwinfarwin!! =PP lols.. thank uu ahhh... always help ur sgt durin ncc!! best friend!!! hahaha:DDDD i ripped tis frm his profile de comment i gave him. i treat farwin as my best friend cuz his super nice. RACE DOESNT MATTER CUZ FARWIN BIN JEFFRIN ROCKS!! :DD
i'll leave here now. (:

2008-08-04T16:48:00.000+08:00

yea... i noe i din post for very long. and i wont be posting for long either. its in between my break!! ((: i will start studying again at 5 to 7.. break den 8-10.. haha! happy me.. so nice my time table.. ((:
jus deleted other blog cuz way too much info. and i dun think anyone will be interested. not gonna blog often now anyway. jus daily thoughts den jus plunk them here.
firstly; being studious, is not nerdy neither is it stupid. its being smart, and thinking of the future. i seldom scold pple on my blog cuz i dun like it. i dun like being immature. if u dun wanna study hard and ruin ur own life, well then, sorry, dun include me. cuz i wan to be a somebody. and i dun wan to let my parents down. i will forgive anyone anytime. but dun expect me to forgive u if u insult my parents. if u wanna insult den jus insult ur mum first. den come to me. yea. u stare at me. so wad???? im not afraid. got gang... even better... secondary school is where we make records, set legends and create new boundaries. not for u to join gang, say f word, and critisize pples parents. u came to me wif all these, and im seriously not impressed. u had a hell big time from me u better learn ur lesson. being filial isnt childish or wadsoever. its only right that ur parents get it from u. how will u like it if u became a parent and ur child doesnt even give a damn about u. seriously u pple dun think ahead. anyway. setting new record. straight A's except chinese. ncc sea i want to be de best. and no ones gonna steal it frm me. and wadever u did today. im not impressed. btw, note to all, ple who use f word often arent very well educated. even if they are, their vocaularly is so limited.